what a year two thousand and thirteen has been. we've witnessed the birth of this here blof. i tweeted a couple times. i'm f-ing sick of the geico pig commercials. other things happened too. so without further a poo here's my best of stuff: year 2013 AD.
*update* do you remember the movie, Senseless? i just remembered it.
Favorite Record Label: Tricot Records
w-w-w-w-w-w-what? shocker right off the get go. now you're intrigued. ha. not your first guess, huh? TR's home of two of my new favorite bands, Ratburn & Princess Reason.
*the former front runner in this category made a questionable business decision a few weeks ago that is now coming back to haunt them.* :]
honorable mention: exploding in sound
they had an all right year
now we'll hold a moment of silence for Graph
r.i.p. you will be missed
Favorite Album and/or EP and/or Split - it's all combined; get over it. ranked the top 20 to hurt some feelings. hope you feel bad if you didn't make it. you couldn't even crack the top 20 and you had two entries. wow
Honorable Mention: but really, how honorable is it to not make the top 20; well i guess it's cool just to make this list at all:
Pope - Known Weed Smoker
Jackie Trash - wow so sad
Euphoria Again - Euphoria Again
Ugh God - Heavy Flow
Many Embers - Many Embers
Native - Orthodox
Temple - The Conscience of the King
YLLA - Backseas
Tough Luck - No New Love
Dating - Please Be Quiet, I'm Very Interesting
Bennio Qwerty - EP
Major Moon EP
Go Plow! - Kal Marks
Ulises Lima - Shonen Bat Split
Forest - Sweetcure EP
Anakin - Emergency Broadcast System
Grammerhorn - Wren Comes Careening Out
Faux Fur - Faux Fur
Selam - Into Blisters Into Bits
Paperhaus - Lo Hi Lo
Wild Moth - Over, Again
Moose Blood - Moving Home
Dead Native - Keep it Strange
LVL UP - Extra Worlds
Thee Open Sex - Thee Open Sex
Treehorn - Bye Forever
Dead Wives - Buzzy Fuzzy
Wave Envy - Yes, Let's
Fury Things - EP 2
Bunny's A Swine - Calling Out
Crying - Get Olde
Junior Astronomers - Dead Nostalgia
whenairturnstowater- Tell Better Stories
LVL UP & PORCHES. 7"
20. Shark? - Savior
^update: i just got drunk enough to order this
19. Kelsi Grammar - BeingPetty
18. Geronimo! - Buzz Yr Girlfriend: Vol 3 - The Metal David Byrne
17. Young Adults - Born in '91
16. Arvid Noe - Islington
15. Summer People - Burn the Germs
14. Tungsten - recorded
13. Princess Reason - Princess Reason
12. PORCHES. - Slow Dance in the Cosmos
11. Reversing Falls - Reversing Falls
10. The Fatty Acids - Boléro
9. Ratburn - The Dangers of Running in Small Circles
8. Ghost Outfit - I Want You to Destroy Me
7. Krill - Lucky Leaves
6. The Here and Now - Born to Make Believe Part 1
5. Vincent Vocoder Voice - Vincent Vocoder Voice
a late addition. i knew this one was gonna be good, but it blew away my expectations. i loved the first single and it's probably my 5th favorite on the album.
4. Two Inch Astronaut - Bad Brother
if we're being honest and we're always honest on this site, i was really surprised how good this was. for real. listening to it right now, almost wanna move it to number one- uh uh ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓ move down there dammit ↓↓↓↓↓↓↓. fuck.
3. Ovlov - AM
this one would've been number one had boner known small voices, but he didn't. way to go boner you cost lil O a chance at the top spot. (i know small voices isn't on AM butt g-damn b)
update* actually after only 2 beers i thought about moving this to number 1
update* after 4 it's staying where it is
*update: c'mon boner; no need to get upset - just joking man
2. Sat. Nite Duets - Electric Manland
this one too would've been number one if i had received my royalty check for appearing on the cover and they also admit they cheat at nfl blitz. but they're ok for the most part, i've slept on their couch more than once. oh and this worm is #tite. but i'll rank this number one when elvis grbac can RUSH for 3 TDs irl.
1.b Fat History Month - Bad History Month
i knew back in april that this would be number one. hell i knew it would be at the top right after Bad History Month was out. h*ck, i can't even pick a favorite song off this album for my favorite song list down below because i don't wanna hurt any of their feelings. what. songs can't feel. sure, butt these songs feel like they have feelings and i don't wanna offend them. can you close out an album any better than i ate myself and i want to die? eh f it cat in a box is the best song, wait what about that laser at the end of the future, that's cool. if i had access to a horse i would make a bad history month music vid but who would trust me with a horse? and blackholes really do suck and fucking damn everyday is christmas is great too. how do i concoct a rating that's fair? LIFE IS NOT FAIR. come back to me fat history month, come back to the world......
1.a Kal Marks - Life is Murder
what the hell hayden you can't have two number ones. well if you don't recall this blog doesn't play by the rules and i'm not ranking this any lower. if yer gonna bitch about it then you can look at it this way- BHM favorite album 1st half of '13- LIM - 2nd half. problem solved. i don't even have a good reason for this being number 1- only a gut feeling. my gut's telling me to grab another beer----=-=----ok getting drunker to give you a better reason why i ranked this number 1a. i'd rather have a reacharound in jail than not listen to kal marks. get it that's a lyric in their song. it's a witty observation if i must say. like how he's cracking jokes to avoid giving you a clear reason why this is ranked number 1. well obviously flat swamp wasn't going in this spot. shit he did it again; he's good at that. but he's getting too far out there- one could say he's way out- in the deep.
Favorite Songs
Rules: one song per artist. that's it
i'm not gonna give any reason why they're ranked the way they are just so it will eat at you and you wont be able to sleep. hehe
Honorable Mention:
in no particular order or there might be if you think about it.
Get Lucky - Daft Punk (i'm drunk)
Normal Person - Arcade Fire (good version)
15.
i've killed a many a hooker listening to this song on gta v & i shut the radio off when it's over. side note: this was a rad song before it was in gta v
14.
13.
12.
11.
10.
9.
8. Kids - Diarrhea Planet
7. No Below - Speedy Ortiz
6.
5.
4.
3.
2.
1.
Best one liners
FHM - Cat in a Box -And even though I miss, and I want to kiss you, I just blow all of my love into a tissue, and I throw it away.
KM - Life is Murder - i've never been so happy with a bottle of lotion in my life
see there's a theme going on here.
Most Memorable Show Even Though I Later Blacked Out in My Car:
Sat. Nite Duets, Grass is Green, Ovlov - Milwaukee
actually hard to recall this one. i drank a lot & saw 3 of my top thousand favorite bands but i do remember making some immoral decisions which make it memorable.
hey everybody likes donuts and that guy didn't seem like he was coming back and i thought $7 for a pair of sunglasses & a box of donuts was fair.
something you might not have heard yet this year butt you should right now
space mountain - ferry lane
this should be my new theme song
Top Award Number One Prize Winner 2013
kurdle
People be like yer hate fer kriLL is a joke but I'm like no I'm pro twittr comedian & kurdle is along fer the ride
— Hayden (@hkarnutz) September 1, 2013
jk you're still krill, bud.
2nd Place: Dead Wivesi'm sorta glad i found out that DW technically still exists this year
3rd Place: Flat Swamp
no reason in particular
#flatswamp
4th Place: Shark?
because im getting pretty drunk right now and just added this
Final Notes
I need to move
At least my car has very good mpg and tape collection
Big Ups might be ok in 2014
As soon as the new Disco Doom comes out you all can give up
I wish I had some of this to drink right now. great beer, better band.
Krill does have a decent twitter handle and I think all exploding in sound bands should have a Wild Hogs actor related handle too like @jOvlovtravolta or @kalmarksinlawrence
I guess public urination is not well enforced or i find excellence piss spots after shows
Everybody that made the list was lucky Pile didn't release anything this year.
wait..... wait..... wait....... hold on a sec..... finishing this beer.... ultra-mega @hkarnutz mode unlocked!
WORST SONGS OF 2013
no f-ing rules
Get Lucky - Daft Punk (i'm sober)
idk. something by Ava Luna
@avalunaband WHATS IT LIKE FOR YOU AND TUCKER TO FORCE YOUR WAY ONTO EVERY BROOKLYN BILL IMAGINABLE AND STILL HAVE NO ONE CARE ABOUT YOU???
— aLaNiS MoRRiSseY (@wyrdtweeter) December 5, 2013
can i put that big ups song on here? ok put it up. it's on here now!prolly a speedy ortiz song; sellouts most def. my stepdad is a jerk and im not intimidated by him. im not intimidated by him. im not intimidated by him.
so bad gonna spell out level up. more like level down. i wouldn't guess this more than once; skip
i'd rather see the new madea movie. it's like eating a pizza w/ no cheese while watching the new madea movie. it's like all that BUTT BEING IN THE NEW MADEA MOVIE.
g-dammit frankie i will harass you fer this pile of doo-doo
i told you to check this out earlier- just not this song it should be the new theme song for Orange is the New Black
you put all your faith into a band hoping they can replicate football team butt they can't :(
have you heard the latest krill album? there's 2 stinkers on it
good luck in 2014 bums.
No comments:
Post a Comment